By Me, Amy Kaye

Thanks to the reality-TV show that recorded her junior year in excruciating detail, Claire Marangello got her big break: her own version of the TV show and a starring role in a Broadway musical. Plus Jeb, a way-hot co-star who seems to like her that way, and a half sister she didn't know she had. It's everything she's ever dreamed of.

Or is it a total nightmare? Her sister seems to be drifting away before they can even connect. Claire's not sure she can trust Jeb and his weird celebrity-centered world. The director seems to hate her; the dance steps are harder than she'd ever imagined-and backstage politics are even more complicated. Everything's unraveling like a cheap leg warmer! Claire's about to learn that while being a Broadway star is a challenge, real life has twists and turns harder than any onstage choreography and is totally . . . unscripted.

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The Real Deal: Unscripted

All right. Once again, the above is the official marketing blah-blah from my publisher, which is groovy. But if you want some real-deal from me, let's see what I can tell you. Well, as you should know, Claire's a character from my first book, The Real Deal: Focus On This, who now takes center stage - just like she always wanted.

Did I ever work on the stage in New York City? Yes, but not on Broadway. Not even near Broadway. I was a standup comic and was in several comedy-improv groups and did some really terrible dinner theater. I loved it! Why? Because I am a ham!

Alas, my career was cut short when it turned out I was terrible. On the other hand, it also turned out that I was a good writer - that is, I completed assignments way ahead of time, and with a style that people seemed to like. Hence my spending this evening sitting in front of my iBook in my apartment in Brooklyn, rather than dancing and singing on a stage in Manhattan. Oh, well - it could be worse, I could have a real job.

I really feel for Claire. Like her, I've got a bit of a fractured family, and have had to struggle to make peace with uncomfortable situations, albeit without cameras watching my every move. Like her, I'm quick to freak out, and then have to deal with the fallout from my emotional outbursts. Like her, I sometimes push people away because I'm afraid to get too close and get hurt. But I do seem to figure things out in the end... to see if she does, too, you'll just have pick up a copy of El Booko, amigos.